As I go to counseling and talk to my family and friends, the truth of things that have happened to me or that I have done will come out. Some will be graphic, others sad, some might just be angering for others. For all this I am sorry, but it needs to come out so that people can understand where my depression and anger come from. There for I do want to apologize a head of time and please don't be afraid to comment or leave your thoughts on my Blog. Thank You.

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"Who then can so softly bind up the wound of another as he who has felt the same wound himself" ~~Thomas Jefferson.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Stress and the ME Factors

Sorry that I haven't written lately but it just feels like things are over whelming me right now between school, taking care of grandma, helping out with mom, and everything else that I take on. Some days I feel like I'm going nuts, others I feel like I know where my head is.

My therapist had me do a little exercise this morning, she filled both my hands with crayons, picked out one for each of my stress factors, and with the ones that were left asked me where I fit in, my reply was that I don't fit in. (I should note here: I asked her if she was going to make me drop them and she said no. LOL) So she then made me open my hands, dropping all but one crayon on the floor. The one that didn't fall she said was "me". My first instinct was to pick them all up, she told me no! She then made me put the crayon in my pocket and told me to carry it every where I go. We went on talking a little bit more and as we were making my next appointment she said again, "your not picking up those crayons lori so don't even think about it." LOL How did she know I still wanted to pick them up? She said she saw me sneaking glances at them through-out the rest of my session.

So as we were walking out, I hesitated to go back and pick up the crayons, she took my hand and walked me to the front desk, told me in no uncertain terms was I to worry about any of those crayons on the floor, worry about the one in my pocket only! So gee I guess she was saying it is time for Lori to wipe out stress factors that shouldnt be in my life and move on taking care of me!

To write another day!

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